Communication is key in all relationships, yet for autistic people, it can sometimes feel like there’s a barrier between their experiences and the experiences of neurotypical people. This phenomenon is often referred to as the double empathy problem. The double empathy problem highlights the challenges both neurodivergent and neurotypical people face when trying to understand each other. It emphasises that communication breakdowns are not solely the fault of a neurodivergent person. At The Neuro Nurture Collective we understand the complexities of this issue and are here to help bridge that gap through compassionate telehealth psychology services across Australia.
What is the Double Empathy Problem?
The double empathy problem, first introduced by researcher Dr. Damian Milton in 2012, suggests that misunderstandings in communication occur not just because neurodivergent individuals have difficulty understanding neurotypical people, but also because neurotypical individuals may struggle to understand neurodivergent perspectives. In other words, both sides experience empathy gaps — hence the term "double empathy." This problem challenges the traditional notion that neurodivergent individuals are the only ones responsible for communication difficulties.
There have been a number of research papers released looking at this phenomenon, with a recent article titled: ‘Rapport in Same and Mixed Neurotype Groups of Autistic and Non-Autistic Adults’ by Foster et.al, in 2025. This study explored how group composition affects the rapport between autistic and non-autistic adults. It found that autistic participants had the highest rapport in all-autistic groups, where they experienced fewer social challenges. Conversely, autistic individuals in mixed groups with non-autistic participants reported reduced rapport. This was explained by the authors as likely due to differences in communication styles, social expectations, and the cognitive demands of masking. The paper’s findings emphasise the importance of understanding the social dynamics at play in mixed groups, emphasising that autistic people may have more positive social interactions when spending time with peers who have a similar neurotype.
The double empathy problem explains that miscommunication and misunderstandings are often due to differing social and communication styles, rather than any inherent inability to empathise. This is especially common in autistic neurotypes, where social norms may not always align with someone’s natural communication style.
How Does the Double Empathy Problem Impact Neurodivergent People?
For neurodivergent people, the double empathy problem can create a sense of isolation and frustration. They may feel misunderstood or dismissed, especially when their communication style doesn’t align with what’s typically expected in society. This can lead to feelings of low self-esteem, anxiety, and social withdrawal. Unfortunately, traditional therapy approaches may sometimes focus too much on trying to ‘correct’ neurodivergent behaviour, to make people look neurotypical, which can exacerbate these feelings.
At The Neuro Nurture Collective, our psychologists take a neurodiversity-affirming approach in our telehealth services. We believe in honouring the unique ways neurodivergent people experience the world. Through this perspective, we aim to build stronger, more empathetic connections between individuals, reducing the impact of the double empathy problem.
The Role of Neurotypical Individuals in the Double Empathy Problem
The double empathy problem isn’t just about the neurodivergent person’s experience. It’s equally about how neurotypical individuals perceive and respond to differences. Often, misunderstandings may occur because neurotypical people are not able to understand or interpret neurodivergent communication styles. Due to ableism, the neurotypical way of communicating is seen as the ‘right way’ and expectations are placed on neurodivergent people to adhere to these, often at great cost to their mental health. It becomes harder for neurodivergent people to advocate for themselves, express their needs, or feel seen in these environments.
This is where neurodiversity-affirming therapy comes in. This approach aims to educate both neurodivergent and neurotypical people on how to communicate in a way that works. By developing mutual understanding, therapy can help people on both sides to communicate more effectively and build more meaningful relationships.
How Therapy Can Help Address the Double Empathy Problem
In our telehealth therapy sessions, our psychologists focus on helping clients understand and navigate the challenges of the double empathy problem. We create a safe space where people can explore their communication style and learn ways to navigate a neurotypical world while preserving their mental wellbeing.
For neurodivergent clients, therapy can provide tools to build self-advocacy skills, allowing them to express themselves more clearly. For neurotypical clients, therapy can offer insights into how to be more empathetic and supportive of neurodivergent communication styles, making it easier to relate and connect.
Why Choose a Telehealth Psychologist in Australia?
Telehealth therapy offers flexibility and convenience, making it easier for people across Australia to access the support they need. Whether you’re seeking to navigate the complexities of the double empathy problem in a personal relationship, or are seeking support for a neurodivergent child or loved one, telehealth therapy provides an accessible option. Our compassionate psychologists are dedicated to offering support in a way that respects your unique needs and experiences.
Contact Us Today to learn more about how we can help you or your loved one address the double empathy problem and improve communication with our neurodiversity-affirming therapy approach. We’re here to support you on your journey toward greater understanding and connection.